Where do I even begin?

This past week has pretty much been nonstop, and this feels like the first time I've gotten to sit down and reflect since getting here last Friday. We launched right in to five days of orientation before taking a break and starting our classes and the language pledge yesterday. And I've been having a blast!

The people in my program here are great; it probably won't come as a surprise that I was able to make friends almost immediately and that I know almost all of the 60+ people at least by name, but I've found some wonderful people that I really connect with. Together, my friends and I have started to blunder our way through the city, and I've remembered how much I love to travel and visit new places. After three days of going on campus tours and getting advice and hearing talks about adjusting to China and safety and etc, the RAs organized scavenger hunts to get us off campus.

This isn't even the whole mall.

There was still a bit of snow left over from Saturday, but luckily, my winter gear has kept me toasty as I've traipsed around outside. On Monday, my group and I rode the bus around Haidian, the district the University is in, to find Jinyuan, the  new Yansha shopping mall. It is a gigantic, six story, 6 million square foot monstrosity that is 1.5 times the size of the Mall of America. I didn't buy anything, mainly because it was so overwhelming and had mainly higher end stuff; why buy all of that here when I could get it for the same price at home? Regardless, it was quite a sight. Or site, if you want to be punny (and I always do).

The lanterns at the market where my
teammates at fried scorpion. 

On Tuesday, we raced around the city on subways, competing to see who could fit in the most in one day. My group decided we didn't care so much about the competition and just wanted to take our time and explore. I discovered that day, among other things, that a tall Starbucks drink is twice the cost of some of the dinners I've had. I am also not brave enough to try fried scorpion, but maybe I'll get there before I leave. It apparently tastes like a chip. As you can see, the air quality was relatively excellent both days; the sky was blue, and it even hurt to stare at the sun! The city is preparing for Chunjie, the Lunar New Year/Spring festival, and making everything look positively festive.

When we finally had a day off on Wednesday before our classes started, some of us went to a nearby park and skated on a frozen lake! Some of my other friends decided to rent a ice bicycle and play on the bumper cars. The ice was definitely not smooth, and the skates weren't sharpened, which made things difficult, but I can now say I've skated on a lake.

As you can see, the air quality that day was particularly terrible-- almost at 500. They advise staying inside if it gets over 300. I joke with my Seattle friends that I'm used to seeing gray skies; the only difference is that here, it's chemicals blocking the sun instead of clouds. I know it's probably terrible for my lungs, but I took off my mask because it was annoying me. I find that I can't really smell or feel the air pollution. You can definitely see it though, although I sometimes mistake it for fog. It doesn't really hit you until later that night when your mouth is dry and your throat is scratchy and no amount of water seems to help.

I've been taking a backseat on these expeditions, just observing and letting the more experienced and Mandarin-fluent people take the lead. We definitely get a lot of looks from the people here; if not because of the Caucasians in the group, then because of our loud English conversations. Funnily enough though, there are a good number of fellow Asians in my program that I've bonded with, sharing the differences between our backgrounds and comparing it to things we've found in China. I think it's almost been a good thing that I only had a semester of Mandarin, because I have no pretensions about my language abilities and can just roll with whatever happens instead of getting frustrated. I just laugh at my limited knowledge and call it an adventure. However, I know I'll have to step up sooner or later in order to push myself, instead of getting other people to speak for me. It'll come. For now, I've been content to just take in my new surroundings.

After the snow on Saturday

It's a miracle! You can see the sun!

你好北京 (Ni hao Beijing)!

Waiting at the airport to be picked up, it finally happened. I had my first Chinese conversation.

I'm finding so far that Chinese people are incredibly kind, like the old man who stowed away my carry-on for me,  the stewardess (from a different airline) who went out of her way to try to help me find mine, or the subsequent people I've had to stop for directions. They didn't actually know a lot of English, but have patiently tried to help me as best they can. In fact, my conversation partner didn't speak English at all. He was maybe older than my father, and had to plug in his phone behind my chair. I was on my laptop, surrounded by my mountain of luggage, and he decided to strike up a conversation. With my very limited Chinese, I was able to convey to him that I was a Vietnamese American going to study at BFSU. I think we finally came to the conclusion that I'm a foreign exchange student coming here after two years of study at college. Unless he thinks that I'll be studying here for two years. It was something about two years.

I think he also said that I look Chinese, not Vietnamese, and proceeded to give me a "pretty" Chinese name: "xiao," meaning short, and a second part I didn't quite catch, but it sounded something like xi. He said it was because Americans are tall, and I must be very short compared to them. He asked me if I liked Chinese people or Americans, and laughed when I said both, saying that I must like Americans better. He proceeded to explain why, but I didn't understand any of it. When his female companion finally arrived, he introduced me as "mei mei," or "little sister" before smiling and saying "bai bai!" as he walked away. Needless to say, I'm feeling a little proud of myself.

Maybe in four months, I'll see him here again and we can discuss the current political climate in China and our favorite modern Chinese literary works.

That Flighty Temptress

"... Let us step out into the night and pursue that flighty temptress, adventure." - Albus Dumbledore, HP #6

So you know the scene in Tangled where Rapunzel is going bipolar about running away? 

This was definitely me at various points of my travel to Beijing:

Really though, I felt the most like Bilbo Baggins. Like Bilbo at the beginning of the Hobbit, there have been too many moments on this trip where I just sit ask myself: "What was I thinking? I'm actually going to China for four months. And I can't go home. Why did I ever leave my cozy little hobbit hole and venture out into the unknown? And why China of all places (which is a whole other post for another time)?"
But hopefully, like Bilbo, I will learn and grow and have incredible experiences to find that I have an adventurous spirit after all.

A few days ago, a friend asked me if I'd cried yet; I responded no, much to her surprise (as well as my own). I definitely got emotional a few times yesterday, but I don't think this has quite registered in my brain yet. It probably won't for another month either. Everyone keeps asking me if I'm excited, but I'll be honest: I'm terrified. If you know me at all, you'll know that I'm a planner. I agonize over the simplest choices, do too much research, and only take the most calculated risks, if I take risks at all. I am only truly adventurous if I know there's back-up, or an exit strategy, and yet, here I am, on a plane to a country I've never been to before, going where I can't speak/understand/read the language. The farthest I've traveled by myself is from Walla Walla to Seattle. Really, I don't think I could've picked a harder program for myself if I had tried. The classes I'll be taking don't even have anything to do with my major, distribution requirements, or future career plans. They're mostly humanities classes, in which I'll have to read 50-70 pages a night and write 8-10 page papers. I've only ever written one paper that long, and that was a history research paper from 8th grade. I also am severely allergic to writing papers; just ask anyone who's watched me do it.

So to combat this anxiety, here is a list: my musings about this upcoming semester (an attempt to prepare myself and make adventure seem a little less scary)

• It's ok if I don't fall in love with the country. It's even ok if I don't like it at all. I am not going for an extended vacation, I am going to push myself and to learn and grow and open my mind to different viewpoints. Even if it doesn't become my favorite place in the world, and my feelings about my host country shouldn't change the fact that this is a valuable experience that I won't regret. (Even if that means not singing a cappella at Chorale Contest, missing Senior Breakfast, Graduation, etc…)
• People will think I'm Chinese and try to talk to me in Chinese. I've accepted that. It will help my language acquisition. :)
• Pollution and terrible air quality. :(
• I am sooooo excited for the Lunar New Year! Although my dad tells me that Beijing will probably be empty with everyone going home. I wish I could go home for the Lunar New Year; it's been 3 years since I've celebrated it with my family.
• Food!
• I'll be turning 21 in China. I plan to celebrate with a mani/pedi, massage and KARAOKE BAR! WOOOO!!!
• Architecture! Site seeing! Parks!
• I'm excited to explore the arts scene: Peking Opera, museums, acrobats, but also classical opera and ballet.
• Will things actually be inexpensive?
• It's going to be so freaking cold. I'm shivering just thinking about it.
• I fully expect multiple breakdowns. I'll probably get really frustrated not being able to fully express my thoughts and not knowing what's going on because I can't read the signs. I'll probably get really frustrated because I have to write papers. But you know? It's all gonna be ok.