This is what my life
has become:
"I hate it when
I accidently turn on my Chinese keyboard when I'm trying to type in English and
my words start coming out weird:
and then when I'm try to
type characters, I forget that I switched out of Chinese mode earlier when I
was annoyed about accidentally turning it on."
My classmates:
"Me too! Like, actually. No sarcasm there."
I mean, in Chinese
mode, all it takes is a tap of the shift key to switch between English and
Chinese. To switch between language modes, it's the start key + space bar. I
enabled Vietnamese for kicks and giggles. Well really, so I can spend twice as
long sounding out Vietnamese words to
get the right tone marks when I message my parents. Can't have my Vietnamese
leaking out of my brain as I try to stuff Chinese into it. According to my
Vietnamese friends, I sound cute speaking Vietnamese because my accent is so clearly Hà Nội I have the
vocabulary of a preschooler. Or something like that. (Thanks guys?)
…
"Guys! The bathrooms here have sit-down toilets!"
"Eh, it's
weird, but I think I actually prefer the
squatties; they're a little more sanitary. Do I need to bring my own toilet
paper?"
"No, they have
some. It might be on the wall outside the stall though. And they have soap. But
be careful: somebody threw their toilet paper in one of the toilets and tried to flush it, so don't use that one."
"It happens.
I've only forgotten once since the first week though!"
…
"OMG Starbucks! I want to try the peach blossom tea latte they have for Chun Jie.
And maybe a red bean pastry...
Wait, a tall costs
30 kuai?! I can feed myself for like, two days with that much."
"If you think
about it though, that's about 5 US dollars… treat yourself."
It was delicious. (Sometimes, you just really want something familiar; a taste of home. This was almost as exciting as the time we found Subway and Dairy Queen, right next to each other.)
…
"Jeez, the wind
is crazy today."
"Yeah, but
tomorrow will be beautiful; that's what they rely on for air quality
control. I wish I was kidding, but I'm not."
"It doesn't
make me want to go outside though. And
I'm hungry."
"Well,
McDonalds delivers! You can have milk tea and taro pie with your chicken
nuggets. Plus, you can even do it online so you don't have to talk to
them!"
…
Looking out the bus
window:
"Oh my gosh!
What are all those people doing? Are they dancing? Is it a flash mob? I love
flashmobs!"
"I think it's
just a bunch of old people doing exercises in the park together. As they
do. It's probably Tai Chi."
…
In China, there is
no such thing as waiting patiently in line for your turn. While there usually
is some semblance of a line, if someone pushes ahead of you, it's your fault
for not being quick enough/aggressive enough/paying enough attention. You just
gotta go for it. Meanwhile, the person behind you is pressed up against your
back and literally breathing down your neck cause personal bubbles aren't
really a thing either.
These things don't
happen constantly, but nobody bats an eye when they do.
This is why I
giggled to myself at church yesterday, when they made this announcement before
everyone went to get Communion:
"Hello
everyone, we have a system here for lining up to receive Communion. The first
pew lines up first, then the next one, row by row. Please wait for your turn to
join the line. Thank you."
Back home, this is a
clear, efficient system that everyone understands; it's so obvious that
it goes unsaid.
After going to this
church in Beijing for a month and watching people go up willy-nilly, as the spirit moved them, I watched the
proceedings with no little amusement. When it was my turn
to go, I stood at the far end of the pew waiting to file out, but the girls
next to me were sitting and giving no indication as to whether they would get
up or that I should pass them. So of course, the pews behind us got impatient
and moved on before I could assess the situation, and the line doubled behind
my row. Could've been worse, I thought as I walked in front of my pew and
inserted myself into the middle of the line with a little smile; these
differences will never cease to fascinate me. I only hope that I will continue
to accept them with good grace.
...
(I know, I know. There's been a crap ton of stuff going on and I haven't been doing a good job recording it all. I have about 5 unwritten posts planned out in my head... They'll happen eventually. Promise.
<3 Myks)
